DEVIL'S ISLAND featuring Atomic Agent
Welcome to this weeks edition of Devil's Island! Every week we maroon a band or artist on the island and see what they get up to, how they cope with being all alone on a small island in the middle of the ocean. It's not your average desert island and we'll see just how each person copes with the extreme conditions.
This week when we arrived at Devil's Island we find Atomic Agent sat on the beach. The island is far from their home, so how did they end up here and how did they cope with life on Devil's Island?
Find out now...
Welcome to The Razors'e Edge and our somewhat lovely, warm desert island. Don't worry about it's name I'm sure it's not as bad as that would suggest.
You're marooned here on this island, but before you ended up shipwrecked you chose one album that you couldn't live without. Which album did you each chose and why?
Just between us, I’ve taken the liberty of tying up and gagging the two other members in my cellar, so the readers will get only my important opinion. The album I’d choose is Slaughter of the Soul by At The Gates.
“Shut up, stop banging the pipes down there!”
Sorry about that.
Just behind that palm tree is a shack for each of you to stay in, with enough space for you to put up a poster on the wall of one album cover. What album cover do you each chose?
For me it would be Reign in Blood by Slayer. On behalf of the bassist, I’d go for some Legion Of The Damned album and the drummer… Let’s say Metal Heart by Accept. Of course, the Reign in Blood poster is bigger than the other two and would be plastered on top of them.
There's also a bar on this here island. But alas each of you only get to choose one drink for the entirety of your stay. What's your tipple of choice?
Hush…! Don’t mention anything alcohol-related out loud as the other members are highly prone to hard drinking… Well, now you just done it, they managed to get out of their ropes! Just a minute…
*violent sounds of wrestling and tying-up*
Where was I…
*clears throat*
Oh yes, they would probably have the crappiest American light beers available and still be happy, I’d have a large glass of Aberlour A’bunadh, a Scotch single malt.
Your suitcases were lost when your ship sank, but you each managed to salvage one item of band merch. What’s the merch and for what band?
Mine would be a Running Wild themed rubber boat, named Jolly Roger. Now, if I’d just have the lungs to fill her up, I’d paddle the hell out of this shithole. But if I just whacked the other band members, I could make suitable sails from their ass skin… Anyway, the bassist would have his trademark gig shirt with a Celtic Frost design. It’s so old, that Tom Warrior’s mom probably hand-painted it for Tom originally. The drummer would probably have his Metallica boxers, with extra holes for ventilation and “hands-free features”.
You’re sat on the island thinking “I’m stuck here on this island with my bandmates for eternity”… who would you rather have been shipwrecked with?
Not many, they’re great guys really, and I’ve worked with both of them for ages so I know we’d get along – until we’d be out of food and I’d have to barbecue them. But otherwise, I’d go for a bunch of lusty super models.
There's a walkman in your pocket, on the tape inside is the recording of the one live show that stands out for you. It could be any show, from any band, anywhere in the world. What show is on that walkman?
I’m not that keen on listening to live recordings, I rather experience live concerts myself, but let’s say Regina Spektor live at China Teatern, Stockholm, 2007. I was there and it was a magical experience, listening to that recording would take me to a very happy place.
You're getting desperate, you decide the only course of action is to put a message in a bottle and hope someone finds it. Your message could be to any member of any band, but should be the most suitable for a rescue attempt. Who is it?
I’d write the message on a free pizza coupon and address it to the bassist from Torture Killer. He’d smell the message from nautical miles away! (Sorry, Kim, had to!)
You've been stuck here a while and food supplies are running low. There's only one thing for it... which fellow band member gets sacrificed to help the others survive?
The bassist gets the axe, no question there. He’s a vegetarian and more fit, so the meat would be more suitable for human consumption. The drummer would make a bigger meal as he is a big boy, but man, he mostly eats junk food so I’d definitely block my arteries a month after barbecuing him. I’d still have to whack him too, because like I mentioned, he is a big boy, and I wouldn’t share the scarce meat with him.
Finally, when the ship sank you each managed to save one person from the wreckage. That person is the one musician that has influenced your career the most, shaped your way of thinking and your outlook on life. Who did you save?
I don’t think there is such a person with all those qualities. Let’s just say Bill Idol, he’d get to tell me confidentially all those juicy stories from his life in the 80’s, that he left out from his dull autobiography.
The bassist might want to save Tom Warrior, perhaps, but the drummer would save Lars Ulrich, so that gives me one more reason to whack him.
Thanks for your time. We hope you get back to dry land before you're next due out on tour!
It was my pleasure, thanks. Not that I can say the same for my fellow band members as they were all tied up during this. I probably should go and release them now…
Now what the hell, they’ve managed to escape and look slightly bemused to say the least!
“Hey, where did you get those pitchforks, they look really stingy? I was just kidding about the sacrificing and I didn’t mean to mock Lars Ulrich. The guys at the Razor’s Edge made me do it, go after them, I know where they live! No, wait, please…! AAAAARRRGHH!”
