DEVIL'S ISLAND featuring Attic Theory
Welcome to this weeks edition of Devil's Island! Every week we maroon a band or artist on the island and see what they get up to, how they cope with being all alone on a small island in the middle of the ocean. It's not your average desert island and we'll see just how each person copes with the extreme conditions.
This week when we arrived at Devil's Island we found rising scouse outfit Attic Theory sat on the beach. The island is far from their home, but how did they end up on here and how did they cope with life on Devil's Island?
Find out now...
Welcome to The Razors'e Edge and our somewhat lovely, warm desert island. Don't worry about it's name I'm sure it's not as bad as that would suggest.
So you're marooned here on this island, but before you ended up shipwrecked you chose one album that you couldn't live without. Which album did you each chose and why?
Lewis: I was going to start the descent into madness early by picking something terrible like the Teletubbies or Mr. Blobby but I’d actually choose Purple by Stone Temple Pilots. I love grunge music but this is grunge without the super miserable side of the genre. It’s been one of my favourite albums since it was released and I always listen to it in its entirety.
Peter: Appetite for Destruction. It got me into guitar and has everything you need in it. Also I can annoy everyone with my Axl Rose impressions and it will drown out the sound of Matt (Simon) listening to Toto.
Tim: I could never live without Dirt by Alice In Chains - it was one of the albums that formed my musical tastes and aspirations and has just never aged, it’s still massively relevant and sounds amazing!
Matt: It’d have to be Metallica’s Master of Puppets. It’s got everything I look for in an album; driving riffs, epic solos and every track is a banger. It’s literally riff after riff and the last album to feature Cliff’s flawless bass lines.
Kenny: This one is almost impossible. Probably Led Zeppelin 2 really, there's something about the way it struts and grooves that just always gets to me… but of course there could be others.
Matt: My chosen album would have to be Jeff Wayne’s The War of the Worlds. Not only is it an amazing album, but it could come in handy for inspiration because the main character ‘The Journalist’ clearly has some pretty good survival skills. Either that, or he’s just an incredibly lucky sod. Anyway, I suppose it can’t do any harm to use all this free time I now have on my hands to prepare for 2021’s alien invasion.
Just behind that palm tree is a shack for each of you to stay in, with enough space for you to put up a poster on the wall of one album cover. What album cover do you each chose?
Lewis: I would probably pick ‘Spiders’ by Space, only because there are loads of spiders on the front cover and Matt definitely has aracnophobia. His reaction to the poster would keep me entertained for weeks. In between this, I would throw spiders in his bed while he was sleeping. Who needs netflix when you have the opportunity to torment your best friends haha.
Peter: Probably the same as the album I chose just because it's bad ass.
Tim: I think it would be Led Zep’s Physical Graffiti - it’s a simple work of art and I'm always looking at the windows to see if anyone ever appears haha.
Lawler: Pearl Jam - Ten. All the hands in the air say to me that we’re all in this together, given the current situation of the ship going down faster than a concrete turd. Plus pinks a happy colour.
Kenny: I'd probably choose a Baroness album cover, like Yellow & Green. I've stared at that thing for fuckin ages.
Matt: The poster I’d put up would most certainly be the original cover of the Scorpions album ‘Lovedrive’. Yep, the one with the couple sitting in the back of the car and the guy fancies his chances of having a cheeky fumble, but ends up with a handful of chewed bubblegum instead. This would constantly remind me in my terrible situation that there’s always someone worse off than yourself.
There's also a bar on this here island. But alas each of you only get to chose one drink for the entirety of your stay. What's your tipple of choice?
Lewis: I recently stopped drinking so I would probably pick an energy drink of some sort. I’d need the boost to help me cope with all of the bullshit spouted by the others.
Peter: Guinness. That way I can drink my meals if I can't find food.
Tim: Small cans of Heineken! As the guys will say, Tim loves a tiny heiny!
Lawler: Most difficult question out of the bunch haha. I’m an avid fan of scotch whiskey and there’s soooooo many to choose from. I’d say a Laphroaig 12 year old as that’s the current favourite but that changes daily.
Kenny: I'd probably choose Stella because I'm a simple person. Stella is brilliant for fights and breakfast too. Since it's an island I may have to punch a flamingo or coconut crab at some point and nothing makes me want to do that more than Stella.
Matt: I love these desert islands that have a personal bar just for me. Undoubtedly my drink of choice would be a White Russian. I’ll get working on that giant ‘SOS’ sign tomorrow, I promise!
Your suitcases were lost when your ship sank, but you each managed to salvage one item of band merch. Whats the merch and for what band?
Lewis: It would be an Attic Theory SnapBack to keep my hair out of my eyes. As for the rest of my clothes, the guys have seen me naked on numerous occasions so I’d be inclined to hang out with my wang out. Let’s make Devil’s Island a nudist colony.
Peter: I have a really nice led Zeppelin shirt that Tim bought me for my birthday.
Tim: My Attic Theory beanie for when my embarrassing hairline gets out of control.
Lawler: Got to be an Attic theory water bottle. Literally the most practical thing. (I swear that wasn’t a plug haha) although they are available on our website.
Kenny: I once had a Cannibal Corpse hoodie that someone stole from me. It was a knock off but whatever kid made it in the sweat shop had talent because it was boss.
Matt: The item of merch I would salvage is our very own Attic Theory zippo lighters because I’ll certainly be needing to light fires and I ain’t no Tom Hanks.
You're sat on the island thinking "I'm stuck here on this island with my bandmates for eternity"... who would you rather have been shipwrecked with?
Lewis: Probably my missus Kelly but I wouldn’t subject her to all of the insanity so I’m going with Donald Trump. We might as well ‘take one for the team’ and get him as far away as possible from the rest of the world.
Peter: Scarlett Johansson.
Tim: Well, my wife and child obviously… or maybe Kate Beckinsale in her Underworld days haha..
Lawler: Anyone. literally anyone… Where's a volleyball when you need one?
Kenny: I would have liked to have been shipwrecked with Ed Gein because he could turn island creatures into interesting things like lamp shades or nipple belts.
Matt: To be perfectly honest, I don’t think I can answer this question. I’d actually be in a fortunate position, given the circumstances, because I think my band has a fairly good chance of surviving being shipwrecked on an island. I’m pretty certain that Tim would be able to catch fish with his teeth and keep us fed. He could probably even weave some sort of lifeboat to sail us back to civilisation.
There's a walkman in your pocket, on the tape inside is the recording of the one live show that stands out for you. It could be any show, from any band, anywhere in the world. What show is on that walkman?
Lewis: Alive in Seattle by Candlebox. Kev Martin’s vocals are flawless. I actually have signed a copy of this.
Peter: Queen live at Wembley. No man can be sad listening to that.
Tim: Pearl Jam’s unplugged MTV set. Absolute masterclass in live performance.
Lawler: Black Stone Cherry: live in Birmingham. I love that set. It flows from start to finish and you can literally feel the live energy coming through. Tbh I’d literally just be listening to rain wizard on repeat.
Kenny: Thin Lizzy's Live and Dangerous. Hands down.
Matt: The live show that is in my Walkman is Queen Live at Wembley ‘86. That for me, is the definition of a live show. Four musicians who were at the top of their game and at their absolute peak. That is how to win an audience.
You're getting desperate, you decide the only course of action is to put a message in a bottle and hope someone finds it. Your message could be to any member of any band, but should be the one musician most suitable for a rescue attempt. Who is it?
Lewis: David Hasselhoff. He’s Knight rider, he was a lifeguard and he actually turned into a boat in SpongeBob Square Pants. Imagine him appearing through the haze, running in slow motion down the beach ready to take you to safety. David, I’m fucking ready lad!
Peter: Bruce Dickinson of iron maiden. He has a god damn plane! He'd save us..... Wouldn't he?
Tim: I’d send a message to Kirk Hammet - he’s clearly the nicest member of Metallica and he’ll have enough money to leave his Wah Wah alone, get in his private helicopter and come save me.
Lawler: Johnny Depp. Who doesn’t want to be rescued by captain jack sparrow, guys got a ship full of rum and the banters top notch haha
Kenny: Our mate Rik or Jonny Lawrence.
Matt: At first I thought about sending the message in a bottle to Bruce Dickinson with our coordinates, so he could fly Ed Force One and pick us up (with a crate of Trooper for the journey home). But I realised that I’m ok for a while, because I have my own personal bar with loads of White Russians and we also have our own personal Terminator- Tim who can hunt, provide food and eventually get us home. So I decided that it’d probably be best to send a message in a bottle to Sting. He’s been sending out messages in bottles for years and I don’t think he’s had any response yet. I feel quite bad for him.
You've been stuck here for a while and food supplies are running low. There's only one thing for it... which fellow band member gets sacrificed to help the others survive?
Lewis: Tim. Definitely Tim. Because he looks finger licking good. Free range Tim, well marinated due to his delicious brisket.
Peter: Kenny. Because by now he's probably drank everyone's booze and fallen unconscious so he'd never know...
Tim: Matt, our drummer, we can always use a drum machine and I reckon he’d taste really nice after a few hours on a spit-roast plus, I’m the BBQ king and band chef so they’ll need me to cook!
Lawler: Got to be Matt Simon. That massive arse could feed us all for a month.
Kenny: Tim is the clear choice for sacrifice. All the others are too skinny or would taste like shitty kebab ashtrays whereas Tim is like if you raised Kobe beef on pork and Tiny Heinies.
Matt: I’m pretty certain I’d be the band member to be sacrificed. I know my fellow musos all too well and I can tell you that they’ll have been planning the Drummer Banquet since the moment we set foot on the island. It makes sense though because I’d be too drunk on White Russians to put up a fight.
Finally, when the ship sank you each managed to save one person from the wreckage. That person is the one musician that has influenced your career the most, shaped your way of thinking and your outlook on life. Who did you save?
Lewis: If he was still with us, Scott Weiland so I’m going to go with Mike Patton or Kev Martin. Like these guys, I like to think I think outside of the box when it comes to writing vocal melodies and I’m not afraid to try something different.
Peter: Slash. Just because he got me into guitar and I've learned a lot from his styles and learned many of his songs through different stages of his career. I think I subconsciously take lots of his phrases and apply it to my own playing. But also, most importantly, and I cannot stress this enough, but I'd really like to wear his hat.
Tim: Jerry Cantrell can do no wrong as a guitarist and I do think I try to emulate him. His tone, his voice, his note choices, his songwriting. It’s all spot on.
Lawler: James Hetfield. He’s a petrol head like me and His style has influenced my playing so much. Like I mostly Down pick when riffing, can shred when needs be but mainly focus on chunky riffs. In my teens I literally wanted to be him haha. Plus a love of all things Metallica got me talking to a few guys which led to my first band and set me on the path I’m on now.
Kenny: As far as musicians that shaped things it's a difficult one. Does the person have to be alive now? I'd say it's probably James Brown. Because James was groove and groove is life.
Matt: Assuming that we’re in an alternate reality where he didn’t die back in the 90’s, I’d save my favourite drummer- Jeff Porcaro. One of the most sought after session drummers throughout his career, he played for Toto and other legendary names from Steely Dan to Michael Jackson. He is one of my biggest influences and has inspired me to be the drummer I am today.
As we sail away from the island we have no room for the band on our small boat. But the band seem content, the bar is well stocked, they seem to have an abundance of their own merch, and they are ever hopeful that David Hasselhoff will launch a rescue attempt.
See you soon lads.... we hope!
Great comments by a great up and coming band funny answers, never heard it called a WANG Before though?